Randomness Included
by AgentJed
Summary: Just some random little stories about some experiments, funny moments, and adventures that the Avengers face. A fun little warning: some of the chapters are really weird.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer- I do not own the avengers.

Also, I have no idea why or how I thought of this story. Hope you enjoy!

Oh, and the title for this chapter is called: Tony and the Apple

* * *

It was a normal day. Tony Stark had just woken up, and he was hungry. He went over to the kitchen and opened the fridge. There was absolutely nothing in the fridge that looked edible to him. So he closed the fridge and looked around for something to eat. Then he saw it. An apple, sitting there all alone in the fruit bowl. He grabbed the apple and for some reason, he felt bad for it. All of the apple's friends were gone. The apple had no one left. _Except me,_ Tony thought. _You know... what if the apple had a wife? And then had little apple children? I need to find out._ Tony quickly rushed out of the kitchen and into the lab. He set the apple down on a desk and looked at it. _Now how can I make this little buddy come to life?_ Just at that exact moment, Tony remembered that he had something that could work on the apple. He walked over to a cabinet and opened it. He pulled out a bottle that read: **LIFE-GIVING LIQUID. USE WITH CAUTION.** Tony smiled and made his way back to the apple. He took the cap off of the bottle, and threw it in the trash can. _Hopefully this works._ He poured the whole bottle full of the liquid onto the apple. Tony waited and waited for something to happen. But nothing did. _I guess I will never find out the secrets of this apple..._ He sighed. Tony was about to walk out of the lab until he heard something.

"A...apple?"

Tony looked at the apple in confusion. Did the apple just talk? He quickly turned around and walked up to the apple.

"Um...hello? Little apple, can you hear me?" Tony said, hoping for a response.

"Ap...apple apple apple," the apple said. The apple started to shake and move. Tony watched very carefully, as the apple started to grow little stick legs and arms. Then suddenly, two eyes and a small mouth appeared on the apple. _What the hell? Is this really happening?_

"Hello? Um..." Tony didn't know what to say. There was actually a living, breathing piece of fruit standing in front of him. "My name is Tony. And uh, there are actually some things I want to ask you... so... yeah. Nice to meet you."

The apple looked at Tony and said, "Apple apple ap apple apple apple." Then it jumped off of the desk and started running away.

"Hey! Come back apple!" Tony said as he ran out of the lab and started to chase the apple. To Tony's surprise, the apple could run really fast. _How the heck am I, Tony Stark, getting beaten by an apple in a footrace?_ When Tony turned around a corner, the apple was nowhere in sight. But then he heard a scream.

"APPLE!"

He automatically knew that it was his apple, and started running to where the scream originated. When he got there, he saw Thor finishing an apple. _Uh-oh. Please don't let that be my apple..._

"Heh, heh... hi Thor."

Thor turned to Tony and smiled. "Well good morning, friend Tony. How are you this fine morning?"

"I'm fine. So, where did you find that apple by any chance?"

Thor looked at the apple core in his hand and back at Tony. "Well, this delicious apple just appeared in my hand. I was here walking to the kitchen, when all of a sudden, this apple appeared in my hand. If I didn't know better, I would have said that this apple jumped into my hand," Thor said with a laugh.

"Yeah, okay. Thanks Thor."

"You are welcome, friend Tony."

Tony walked back to the lab with a sigh and sat in his lab chair. _I guess I will never know how that apple lived._


	2. A Duck Named Bill

Disclaimer- I do not own the avengers.

Also, thank you for reading! My friend helped me with this one.

* * *

 _Ding ding!_

Bruce Banner was drinking some tea when he heard a ringing noise. "Jarvis, what was that?" Bruce asked.

"It was the doorbell, Dr. Banner," Jarvis stated.

The doorbell? Tony didn't tell him that he was expecting someone today. Bruce set down his cup of tea, and stood up. "Who is it Jarvis?"

"I suggest you see for yourself."

"Oh. Okay then." Bruce walked over to the door of the tower. What did Jarvis mean by that? Bruce looked through the tiny peephole in the door and saw no one. _What the- why is no one there?_ Bruce thought. He grabbed the doorknob and opened the door. _I think Jarvis would have told me if it was just a couple of little punks- uh..._ Bruce was surprised when he found a little duck standing there. The duck's feathers were pure white, and its bill was a dark shade of yellow. Bruce saw something on the neck of the duck and bent down to grab it. It was a note strapped to a piece of string. He ripped the note off the the thin strand of string, and opened it.

 **To whoever is reading this:**

 **This is a poor, little old duck that needs a family.**

 **His name is Bill.**

 **We wish that you can take care of him and love him with all your heart.**

 _Bill, huh? Well, sorry little fella but I don't think anyone will appreciate the fact that I let a duck into the tower._ The duck kept staring at Bruce and Bruce kept staring right back.

"What do you wa-OWWW!" The duck jumped up and bit his hand, hard. "What the heck was that for?" The duck completely ignored him and ran straight past him into the tower. "Hey! Come back here!" Bruce ran after Bill and started to notice his heart rate going up. _Calm down, Bruce. You don't need to get so worked up about a stupid duck._ Bruce saw the duck run into the living room. He peeked around the corner and saw the duck just sitting there, on the couch. _This is my chance._ Bruce slowly walked up behind the couch, thinking Bill didn't see him. Well, he was wrong. Bill turned and kicked Bruce in the face with its small feet, then jumped off of Bruce's head and started to run away again. Bruce's heart was beating faster and faster... _NO! Calm down. Breath. In, out. It's just a duck. A very smart duck. Okay, I am sick of this duck. Just grab it by the neck or something..._ He started running towards the way Bill went. When he finally caught up to Bill, he noticed that Bill was trapped in a corner. _Ha, not so smart now..._ Bill looked at Bruce and started to realize the position he was in.

"This ends now."

000

It was dinner time in the tower. Today, it was Bruce's turn to cook. All of the Avengers were sitting at the huge dining table, waiting to see what Bruce cooked. The scent of meat filled the air. Steve loved the smell and asked Bruce, "What are you cooking there Bruce? It smells so good!"

"I agree with Steve. The smell is so good!" Natasha said. The other Avengers nodded in agreement.

Bruce smiled as he took out a big pan from the stove and set it on the table.

"Today we are having something I like to call, Duck."


	3. Shush

Disclaimer- I do not own the Avengers.

Ever wondered how the Avengers will act while playing the "quiet game"?

* * *

All Natasha wanted to do was have some peace and quiet. But it's kind of hard when you live with five other people. Tony was teaching Steve how to play checkers, Thor was laughing at Clint while he was trying to pick up his hammer, and Bruce was reading. Natasha glanced at Steve, who was raging over some stupid game of checkers. Knowing Tony, he would probably take advantage of someone who has never played checkers before, and make up some rule that would help him win.

"HA! Take that Steve!" Tony said while pointing his finger at Steve.

"What? But, I thought you can't jump over more then one piece!" Steve said, face as red as a tomato.

 _Who knew that the first Avenger would get so mad about checkers,_ Natasha thought.

"Yes, well-um..." Tony said, trying to think of an excuse. "Well, yeah. But you can jump over more then one piece if um... you only have eight pieces left! Yeah, definitely."

"Really? That doesn't seem fair."

"But it's the rule, so you have to accept it."

"What if I don't want to accept it? Are you really telling me the actual rules of checkers?"

"Of course! Just play the game and forget about it!"

"I don't want to just forget about it!"

Natasha sighed. She looked over at Thor to see why he was laughing so much. She saw Clint trying to pick up Mjolnir.

"There has to be some type of trick to this... right?" Clint said with both of his hands on the hammer.

Thor's laugh was just impossible to ignore. It was just so loud and weird. "Trick? No. There is no trick. You are just not worthy."

"Not worthy? No way. I will pick up this hammer!"

"I'd love to see you try, Clint."

"I AM TRYING!"

Natasha was starting to get sick of all of this noise. Then she had an idea.

"EVERYONE LISTEN TO ME!" Natasha screamed. Everyone turned their heads towards Natasha. "I have an idea. Why don't we play a little something called, the quiet game? It would be fun."

Tony had that look on his face that clearly meant, why would that be fun? "Are you serious? No way I am playing that g-"

"OKAY, starting in 3, 2, 1, go!" Natasha cut Tony off because she didn't have enough patience for his snappy comeback.

For the first five minutes of the game, everyone was just staring at each other. Natasha noticed one of Tony's eyes twitched a bit...

"I CAN'T TAKE THIS! I MUST SPEAK!" Tony said.

Clint looked surprised. "Hey! You can't just do that! You didn't even try."

Thor looked confused. "Is the game over? Is this why they are talking?"

"No Thor. The purpose of the game is to not talk whatsoever," Steve said, not realizing that he just lost.

"But then why did Tony and Clint talk?"

"Because they suck at being quiet."

Tony thought otherwise. "Ahem, actually Steve, I must talk. It is in my nature. Can you imagine me, the great Tony Stark, not being able to talk?"

"Yes, actually I can. It would be a miracle for all of us."

"I agree with Steve," Clint said.

"What? No. Just because he has a voice that attracts all of the girls does not mean you can join his side too Clint!"

"I can do whatever I want Tony!"

"Are you sure about that, bird boy?"

"I am absolutely sure, metal man!"

"JUST SHUT UP! ALL OF YOU!" Natasha screamed, "Can't you see that I won already?"

Tony, Clint, Steve, and Thor just realized that they lost to Natasha at a quiet game. But then they heard a slight cough in the other side of the room. They all turned their heads, and saw Bruce standing up with his book in his hand.

"Actually," Bruce stated, "I think _I_ won this little, 'quiet game' that you started Natasha."


	4. Scarf of Truth

Disclaimer- I do not own the Avengers.

Thanks to everyone reading!

* * *

Steve was bored. He needed something to do. He was sick of listening to Tony while he was fixing his suits, when he didn't even understand most of the things Tony was saying anyway. Steve just wanted to do something fun.

"So what you do when you fix this part here, is that you have to do it in a way where you will not damage it," Tony said.

"I think everyone knows that Tony," Steve said while crossing his arms. Tony looked at Steve for a fraction of a second and smiled.

"Did I just hear some _sarcasm_ come from you? Wow, I thought it could never be done."

"Yeah right Tony."

Steve was thinking about leaving when Jarvis said something.

"Mr. Stark, there is a box at the door."

Tony continued what he was doing and replied, "Cool. Who is it from?"

"I don't know Mr. Stark."

Tony started to slow down on fixing his suit. "How do you not know who it is from? I thought we have security cameras on every inch of this property."

"Yes, but the box appeared out of nowhere."

Tony then stopped what he was doing and looked straight ahead, as if he Jarvis was standing right in front of him. "So you are telling me that a box appeared out of nowhere."

"Yes."

"At my front door."

"Yes."

"Okay then. I want to see this box right now." Tony was about to take off his gloves when Steve had an idea.

"Actually Tony, why don't I get it? You are busy right now, right? So I'll just get it."

"But-"

"YES? Okay then, bye."

Steve jolted out of the room before Tony could say anything. _Finally,_ Steve thought, _I can get away from Mr. Know-It-All._ Steve walked to the door and opened it. Jarvis was right, there was a box sitting there. Steve picked up the box, which was incredibly light, and brought it inside. He set the box on the table, thinking that it was for Tony. But then something caught his eye. The label on the box said: TO STEVE RODGERS AND ONLY STEVE RODGERS. _It's addressed to me?_ Steve was surprised. He never gets mail. He ripped the tape off of the box and slowly opened it. Inside, there was a tiny note and a scarf. Steve picked up the note and opened it.

 **To The Famous Captain America, or Steve Rodgers-**

 **Hello. Hopefully you have received this note.**

 **I know you are probably wondering: How the heck did this box just "magically" appear at the front door?**

 **Well, this is a secret that must be kept.**

 **You will see only one other item in this box besides the note.**

 **This item, is the Scarf of Truth.**

 **I will not explain what it does, it is pretty self explanatory.**

 **All you have to do is wear the scarf.**

 **Thank you, and use the scarf wisely.**

Steve folded the note and set it beck on the looked at the scarf. It had stripes that were red, blue, and white. On every blue stripe, there were little yellow dots. _I see. They were trying to make it look like an american flag._ He touched the fabric on the scarf and it was super soft. He gently picked it up. _I wonder what they meant about what it does. I mean, it's just a normal scarf. Well, it looks normal at least. He, or she, said to wear it...so i guess i will._ He wrapped the scarf around his neck. It actually looked pretty nice on him. He didn't feel any different...

"STEVE! I NEED YOU DOWN HERE NOW!"

Steve quickly headed towards the room where Tony shouted. When he arrived, he saw Tony hitting the suit that he was fixing with a wrench.

"STEVE! Thank goodness you came."

"What's wrong?" Steve asked.

"My suit, it um... it just..." The suit started to move and twist. Tony was still hitting it with a wrench as hard as he could. "JUST PULL THAT CABLE OVER THERE!"

"Okay," Steve stated as he looked for the while Tony was talking about. "Where is it?"

"It's right-AHHH!" The suit started to randomly shoot at everything in the room. "IT'S NEXT TO THE DESK!"

Steve ran over to Tony's desk, trying his hardest to dodge the lasers going around the room. He saw one wire, grabbed it, and yanked it as hard as he could. The suit stopped shooting, and shut down. Tony sighed.

"Thanks..."

"What happened?" Steve asked.

"Nothing. It just...um...did that." **_Well, actually I accidentally triggered the 'shoot everything in sight' mode._**

 _Wait. What was that? Tony just said that it just "happened", but I heard another voice say that he accidentally triggered it..._

"You triggered the mode that basically kills everyone?" Steve said, confused.

Tony stared at him in shock. "H-how did you know that?"

"You just said that, right?"

"NO! I did not say that. I said it just happened...it's like you read my mind.

Steve was now super confused. How did he know that? But then it hit him. It was the scarf. The scarf of _truth_. It tells Steve when somebody is lying. _No way. I got to test this out.._

"So, Tony... how do you think of me as a friend?"

Tony gave him a blank face. "What does that have to do with anything?"

"Just answer it."

"Okay. Well... you are a good friend. **_Sometimes._** You have helped me with many of my problems. **_Actually, only a tiny few..._** I think that is very nice of you. **_You can just be an attention grabber sometimes._** Without you, we, the Avengers, would probably not be here right now."

"Wow. Um...thanks?" Steve was happy and mad at the same time. Happy because he can tell when somebody is lying, and mad, because Tony just said some lies about him being a good friend.

"You're welcome. **_I guess. What was that all about..._** "

Steve decided to leave before he gets even more mad at Tony. "I'm going now."

"Okay. And also, where did you get that scarf?"

"The box," Steve said as he walked away.

000

Steve decided that it was a good time to have lunch. He grabbed two slices of bread, a slice of cheese, and some turkey. He thought a turkey sandwich would get his mind off of Tony. He made his sandwich, and sat down at the dining table. Right when he was about to take a big bite out of his sandwich, Bruce stormed into the kitchen. Bruce pulled the handle of the refrigerator so hard, that Steve thought it was going to break. He grabbed a bottle of water and then slammed the door shut. Bruce's eyes were a little green...

"Hey, Bruce?" Steve said in the calmest voice he could say.

"What," Bruce said, voice cracking and a little lower then usual.

"Are you okay?"

Bruce paused for a moment and then said, "I am completely FINE." **_NO NO NO NO NO NO I AM NOT FINE I HATE MY LIFE WHY IS MY LIFE SO HARD JUST CALM DOWN CALM DOWN CALM DOWN...CALM DOWN...calm down... NO I CANNOT CALM DOWN JUST...AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!_**

"Are you sure about that..." Steve was surprised that Bruce's thoughts are like that. Does he think that every time he is angry?

"Just leave me alone. _Please_." **_I can't take it anymore... just calm down...calm down..._**

"Okay, Bruce. I will."

Bruce speed walked out of the room. Steve wondered how he lived like that every day of his life. Not being able to get mad, and such. Why was Bruce mad in the first place?

"Hey, Steve."

Steve turned his head and saw Clint standing there with his bow.

"Hi Clint."

"Um... you noticed Bruce being a little mad... right?" **_Should I tell him? Should I tell him?_**

"Clint," Steve said with seriousness in his voice, "Tell me what happened."

Clint looked a little shocked that Steve knew what he was going to say.

"I sort of... destroyed something of his."

"What did you destroy, Clint?"

"I don't know! I think it's some kind of science experiment he was working on." _**Of course it was an experiment. Why am I so stupid?**_

"Okay then. Just say sorry or something to Bruce."

"Yeah fine." **_It doesn't work like that... you can't just say 'sorry' to someone who has anger issues._**

Clint walked away. Whatever Clint destroyed, it must have been very important to Bruce. Steve continued to eat his sandwich, and then decided to go for a walk. He took the scarf off though, because he had enough of other people's emotions.

000

When Steve arrived back home, he went to the place where he set down the scarf. But it was gone. Steve was freaking out. _Where did it go? Did someone else take it? This is bad... I need to find that scarf now!_

"Looking for that scarf?"

Steve turned around and saw Tony holding some string in his hand.

"Yes. I am."

"Sorry. It's not here anymore. Well, not in scarf form at least." He held out the small pieces of string in his hand.

"Tony! What did you do to my scarf?"

"I kind of accidentally put it in the garbage disposal. _But_ , I did manage to keep some of the string!"

"WHY DID YOU PUT THAT IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL? IT WAS A SPECIAL SCARF!" Steve yelled.

"Whoa, chill out. I thought it ruined your 'captain' look, so I got rid of it. I didn't know it was that important to you, honestly."

"B-but, why Tony? That scarf was special. And don't you think that since I wore the scarf, I liked it?"

"Well, yeah. But it looked so goofy. I just worry that people will think you are crazy if you wear that scarf. I was just trying to be a good friend," Tony said as he was trying not to smile.

"Thanks a lot Tony," Steve said sarcastically.

"You are very welcome, Cap."


	5. Dream World

Disclaimer- I do not own the Avengers.

Thank you for reading! I really appreciate it. I mean it!

* * *

"Guess what I made," Tony said holding a bottle in his hand. Clint was shooting arrows at a target 70 feet away. He was so focused on the target that he didn't even hear Tony. "Hello? Clint? I'm speaking." Clint grabbed another arrow and put it up to his bow. He closed one eye. He pulled the arrow back and concentrated on the target even more. "Um... I'm trying to talk here, Clint. This is important." Clint was in the perfect position. He must not mess this up. He was about to let go of the arrow...

"CLINT LISTEN TO ME!" Tony shouted. Clint flinched in shock and accidentally let go of the arrow.

"WHAT DO YOU WANT TONY? CAN'T YOU SEE I'M PRACTICING?"

Tony took a few steps back and frowned in a way that made Clint feel uncomfortable.

"Sorry, Tony. It's just... I don't get a lot of free time. And right now, is my free time, finally. So all I want to do is practice. Alone."

"This is SUPER important though."

"Not now."

"But-"

"GO."

Tony stared at Clint with a blank face. "Fine," he said, "I will." Tony turned around and walked away. Clint started to practice again. He grabbed an arrow, pulled it back, and was about to shoot. But then...

 ** _SMASH!_**

Clint felt something slam onto his head. He fell to the floor, in pain, and grasped his head. He tried to get up, but he felt... sleepy. Clint heard somebody say, "You can't get rid of Tony Stark that easily..." and then fell into a world of darkness.

000

Clint opened his eyes. _What happened,_ he thought. Then it all came back to him. _That darn Tony. Grr... I will get him back if it is the last thing I d-_ Clint froze. He just noticed something a bit odd.

Everything was pink.

Clint stood up and looked around him. The grass underneath him was pink, the clouds were pink, trees, flowers, and even the sky was pink. Clint didn't know what to do. He was in a grassy field that was completely pink. _What the actual heck._ Clint then saw something in the distance, walking towards him. He reached to grab his bow, but it was gone. The mysterious thing was coming closer to him. Clint started to run in the other direction. He didn't know what the thing was, so fleeing was his best option. He kept running and running, until he heard a voice.

 _"Little darling Clint._

 _I know you must be scared._

 _But do not worry._

 _Your pain will be shared."_

The voice was singing. Clint started to run again. _What does that mean? 'Your pain will be shar-'_ Clint felt a sharp pain on his foot. He tripped and fell, face first into the grass.

 _"Now you can not run._

 _You must stay here._

 _And to make sure you stay put,_

 _I will guard you with this spear."_

A wooden spear appeared in front of him. And of course, it was pink. The spear was floating around him, like it was ready to strike him at any second. Clint tried to stand up, but the spear quickly shot towards him, and stopped right in front of his neck. Clint didn't want to admit it, but he was scared. Like, really scared. He slowly sat back down and the spear slowly backed away. _Great. I am stuck here with no way to escape._ Clint, once again, did not know what to do. When he thought the spear was 'looking' away from him, he made a run for it. But the spear caught up to him, and Clint fell into the black hole once more.

000

 _"You think you can leave?_

 _You can never, ever escape!_

 _And the truth be told,_

 _It is good for everyone's sake."_

Clint shot up and hit his head on something. "OW! WHAT THE HECK?" He opened his eyes and saw a piece of metal, about 3 inches from his face. He looked to his left, then his right, and the walls were also metal, about 3 inches away. Then Clint automatically knew where he was. He was in an air vent. He shifted his body so that he was on his stomach. Clint started to crawl to an opening, or, what he thought was an opening. When he got there, he saw two things sitting outside. They seemed to be talking, so Clint decided to eavesdrop on their conversation.

"HEY, DID YOU HEAR THAT AGENT X?"

"NO I DIDN'T AGENT Y. YOU MUST BE IMAGINING THINGS."

"BUT ROBOTS DO NOT IMAGINE, AGENT X."

"OH. RIGHT. YOU MUST HAVE HEARD SOMETHING THEN."

"WE MUST TELL MASTER AGENT A!"

"YES WE MUST!"

Clint saw the two robots walk away. _Crap. I have to get out of here._ Clint dropped down from the air vent.

"FREEZE HU-MAN."

Clint turned around and saw another robot standing there, but with two lasers coming out of his shoulders.

"Oh... um... I come in peace?"

"SILENCE! YOU SHALL BE TAKEN TO MASTER AGENT A! YOU WILL FOLLOW ME TO HER!"

Clint followed the robot to a really huge room. And guess what? The whole room was pink, just like the grassy field he was just in. Clint saw a woman sitting on what looked like a throne, and was holding the pink spear that tried to kill him.

 _"Well, well, well._

 _What do we have here?_

 _I didn't know you were this close to us..._

 _And now you are very near."_

"No way. You are the voice that keeps talking to me, right?"

The woman stood up and slowly walked over to Clint.

 _"I want to challenge you."_

"To what?" Clint asked.

 _"One versus two."_

"Huh?"

 _"The only way to escape..._

 _as you can see..."_

"Yes?"

 _"Is to beat me."_

"WHAT? No. Especially if we are doing a one versus two. I don't even have my bow with me!"

 _"3..."_

"Why did you say three?"

 _"2..."_

Clint then realized what she was doing. She was counting down for some reason.

 _"1..."_

Clint braced himself...

 _"You're asleep..."_

Clint was about to question her, but then he felt the same pain as when Tony hit him on the head with some object.

 _"Good night..."_

000

"Wake up, Clint."

"Ugh..."

"Clint. I will not repeat myself."

Clint slowly opened his eyes and saw something standing over him.

"GAH!" Clint quickly stood up and went into a fighting stance.

"Woah. Hey, it's me Tony. You know, the billionaire?"

"What? You're... you're not a robot?"

Tony looked confused. "Why would I be a robot?"

Clint relaxed himself just a tiny bit and said, "I was- there was- er... okay. So there was this place that was completely pink, like, everything was pink. Then there was this voice, and then there was this magical spear, and then-"

"Hold it right there. There was a _magical_ spear?"

"Yes. Then I like, fainted or something like that... and then there were robots. The robots had weird names like, Agent X, and more. Then the voice from before, was actually a girl. And for some reason, she has to rhyme when she speaks. It was weird. Then she challenged me to a battle? I think. And then I woke up here."

The look on Tony's face was priceless. It was a mix between confusion, and happiness. Then Tony shouted, "IT WORKS! Yes..."

"What works?"

"You see, do you remember that really hard blow to your head?"

"Yes..."

"Well, that was me smashing my new invention, Dream Enhance Liquid, onto your head."

"Why did you smash it onto my head when you could have just, you know, make me drink it or something?"

Tony took a few steps back.

"It only works when you are sleeping."

"You could have just waited until I was asleep," Clint stated.

Tony took a few more steps back.

"I might have wanted to... smash something on your head as payback..."

Tony ran away, laughing, while Clint was right behind him.

"I WILL GET YOU TONY!"


End file.
